Posted by Shawn Gold on Sat, Jan 07, 2006, 2:52 pm PST on Yahoo
Provided by: The Guide to Laughing at Love

“She tries to reads my mind, and if she can’t read my mind, she reads my mail.”
– Walter Slezak, talking about Ginger Rogers in “Once Upon a Honeymoon”

I want to clear the air about jealousy. I think a little bit is good, human, natural, and possibly even sexy. As a man, I strive to build trust in a relationship, but I do like a hint of jealousy in my woman. I think my grandfather conveyed to me at some point in my rearing that “a woman without jealousy like a ball without bounce.” It is a polar reflection of your emotional security and part of the organic energy of any union.

It’s highly normal — well, the fear of losing the thing you love most is an exceptionally normal thing to feel. The thing that is abnormal about jealously is the outgrowth of suspicion that accompanies it, and how jealousy can change who you are as a human being. Not many people realize this. but when you are jealous, you are five-time loser. You not only suffer from jealousy, you let the jealousy reduce you to being something else — excluded, aggressive, crazy, and common. One problem that perpetuates unhealthy jealousy (besides lying scumbags) is the belief that jealousy is a measurement of a lover’s interest in the relationship. If jealousy measures anything, it is a merely a measurement of the degree of your lover’s insecurity.

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